You are probably experiencing anger, hopelessness, and resentment if you are currently going through a marriage crisis. You might feel that you are headed for a divorce and that there isn’t a thing you can do about it. Saving your marriage is possible if you and your spouse commit to making some changes. Here are five strategies you can use to build a stronger and better marriage.
1. Make A List Of Your Problems
Have you actually had a talk with your spouse about the marriage and why you are unhappy with it? Resentment can build up over the years when problems are not addressed.
It is not unusual for one of the spouses to be unaware that their behavior is driving the other spouse crazy if the issue is never brought up. Sit down with your spouse and talk about your relationship. Make a list of the things you fight about and of the things you would like to change.
2. Work On Yourself
You might feel emotionally drained if you are going through a marriage crisis. It is important to take some time for yourself and to do things that make you happy so you can bring more positive energy to the marriage.
You could for instance benefit from spending an afternoon with a group of friends or from scheduling an activity you enjoy. If you have any personal issues that have been negatively impacting the marriage, it is time to take time to consider and address them.
3. Resolve Your Differences
Do you find yourself constantly fighting about the same things? You need to identify these issues and find solutions. If you and your spouse are always fighting about money, it is time to sit down and put together a budget and to agree on how money will be spent. You might have to make compromises to resolve your differences.
On the money issue, most couples find it very helpful to sit down with a financial specialist or go through a class about making a spending plan.
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4. Talk About Your Needs
A good marriage is a relationship that meets the needs of both spouses. Everyone needs to feel appreciated, supported and loved. Talk about your needs with your spouse and ask them what they expect from the marriage. Ask them about things you can do in order to meet their needs and suggest things your spouse can do in order to meet yours.
5. Connect With Each Other
It is important to connect with your spouse. Otherwise, your marriage might suffer from a lack of communication and intimacy. Work on becoming each other’s best friend by spending quality time together. You need to laugh together every day. Don’t hesitate to schedule some time you can spend together if you are both busy with your jobs and other obligations.
These five strategies for saving your marriage will help you get back on the right track. You should talk with your spouse about using these strategies and put together a plan you can follow to address the things that have been hurting your marriage. Think about getting help from a marriage friendly counselor, coach or therapist if you feel that you can’t fix your marriage without help.
Marriage Counselor & Author
In my personal life, I have had a long successful marriage and have remarried following my husband's death. I have had three sons and helped raise a niece for three years and have seven grandchildren. I have loved spending time with them as they were growing up.
I also enjoy getting together with family and friends, ATVing in the mountains, photography, hiking, and traveling. I also enjoy reading, creating art, decorating, and serving others by volunteering.
Assisting couples in rebuilding their marriages has been so rewarding as I've had the privilege of seeing hundreds of couples reunite and get back to being positively connected to one another.
I also work with personal development and those who want to move forward by making positive improvements such as goal setting, self-care, boundaries, behavioral improvements, overcoming procrastination, conflict management, etc.