Frequently Asked Questions

It depends on a lot of things. One issue is how long the problems have gone on. For example, if a couple is very willing to do things differently than usual, get out of their comfort zone, a change can begin fairly quickly. I have seen things begin to turn to the positive in as quickly as two to three weeks.

No, I also work with individuals all the time on many issues. Sometimes it’s a mid-life change, sometimes a career change, a single person looking for a mate, dealing with depression or anxiety. Additionally, I work with parenting issues and with children and teen behavior issues.

Some clients want either individual or group coaching for setting and reaching life goals. You may want to look at my other website PersonalDevelopmentServices.com

You can also check out my Personal Development Blog for more tips and help with personal growth.

Other Options for Non-Marriage Related Help:

WouldYouPickYourself.com – Focusing on those who are single again after a divorce or break-up.

ReadyForGreatRelationship.com – For those who are looking for a healthy relationship, but not married yet.

Live With Purpose Facebook Group

I work with singles individually as well as in small group settings to get ready for a healthy loving relationship. Most of those groups are live online video groups where people can share with one another as well as interact with me.

The good news is that in my experience if a couple is truly willing learn, make some changes, and will keep coming for a few weeks to two or three months, they do see positive results.

However, if a spouse is only attending and pretending to be sincere, or to cover their guilt, obviously it won’t be helpful. You probably really can’t know without trying.

I always say, what can you lose by making a real effort? At least if you do end up divorcing, you can feel good if you gave it your honest effort. You, of course, cannot make decisions for another person, but you can influence them greatly by your own new actions and attitudes.

If you read the About description you notice I take a very positive but realistic approach and do believe everyone can change. If I didn’t believe that, it would be impossible to work with people with problems daily.

Additionally, I also take a very practical and pro-active approach and introduce tools that people can actually begin to use right away in their daily life. I work as a team member to help the couple find ways to solutions and to help one another feel loved, cared about and important.

No, I am not one who spends a great deal of time on old history. At the same time, I do believe history can become the pair of glasses through which a person views life. Helping others learn or find new perspectives can be helpful in understanding those who are very different from ourselves and our histories.

I believe I am probably more pro-active and solution-oriented than many others. I’m one who not only listens but gives feedback and helps people look at their own instinctive ways of reacting. I also provide many practical, pro-active, helpful tools that many couples have never learned and but find both fun and easy to use.

I can’t answer for others, however, my goal during our first session together is to understand the current situation and some of the past, and begin to build hope for change and share at least one to three “tools” that can be used right away.

To speed up the process I have each person fill out a four page form telling me their life story and what they would like to accomplish while working together. I also check on how they are feeling, what they are thinking, support system, health, etc. I ask also how they will know when things are better.

Many people come in thinking I will serve as judge and jury, decide who is right and who is wrong and straighten out that other person! Of course, that is not how it works. We work as a term to understand what each person needs and how we can move ahead in positive ways.

I’m a big believer in damage control and not adding any more pain to what has already occurred. If things are not working, we find actions that can turn things around quickly in daily life. Then as we continue to work together to change the dance or the patterns in their behaviors, we begin to work on healing and moving beyond all that pain.

It depends a lot on the severity of the problem(s) and how much effort is made between appointments.

During a big crisis, I occasionally do two times weekly. Much of the time, I do weekly sessions for at least four or more weeks. If things are going well, we may try every two weeks to see how that works.

Sometimes people slip back and return to weekly. When people reach the time where things are going well consistently, couples sometimes want to come monthly at least a couple times to keep things on track.

I’ve had couples who want to come in occasionally just to stay on track. Because we have worked together it is much easier to keep on track with someone who already knows their story.

I am always very open to answer your questions and in fact welcome them. Please feel free to either email me at coachwaverly@waverlyhanson.com.