Have you become dissatisfied with your marriage? If you are thinking about getting a divorce or simply would like things to be different, please look into receiving marriage help. Meeting with a marriage counselor, therapist or coach will allow you to address your problems and you and your spouse will learn how to communicate and to build a great relationship.
Bring Up Receiving Marriage Help
You cannot work on your marriage if your spouse is unaware of your problems or is not willing to make some changes. This is why you need to bring up counseling or therapy and explain why you think you would benefit from receiving help from a professional. Try identifying some specific problems you want to address and explain why you are not satisfied with the marriage.
Don’t Blame Your Spouse
Remember you will need to bring up your marriage problems in a constructive manner. Talk about the potential you see in the marriage and about the things that used to make you happy. You might be tempted to blame your spouse for your problems but this is not a constructive way to approach the issue. If you have made some mistakes, and all humans do, take responsibility and apologize for them to show your spouse you want to resolve your conflicts.
It will be easier to address your issues if you can stay positive. Your spouse might not have the same attitude at first but you should still do your best to bring positivity to the marriage. This will help your spouse realize that you both could have a much happier marriage once you make a few changes and they will probably soon adopt the same attitude.
Explain Why You Want Counseling
Think of a few specific reasons why you would like to meet with a counselor or with a therapist. You could mention some personal problems that you or your spouse are experiencing. You could also explain that you need a counselor so you can talk about your issues without arguing or to develop better communication skills.
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Convince Your Spouse That the Marriage Is Worth Saving
Your spouse might be already thinking about a divorce and might not be willing to work on the marriage. You can convince them that the marriage is worth saving by explaining that you are committed to becoming a better spouse and that you think the marriage could bring you both happiness once you address your problems. Show your spouse that you are ready to make some changes by starting to work on your problems even if you are doing it by yourself.
Seek Help Yourself if Your Spouse is Unwilling
Most people believe that it is necessary that you both go to counseling, therapy or coaching in order to make any difference in your marriage.
This is truly a myth. I have worked with one person in the relationship numerous times and have seen their relationship become positive just by one person making changes. It is interesting to see how one person taking different actions nearly forces a different reaction.
Getting your spouse to commit to saving your marriage might not be easy, but it will be worth a try. In the meantime, get the help you need yourself and know you alone can make a great difference.
You might have to start working on the marriage by yourself and focus on convincing your spouse that your relationship is worth salvaging by being the best partner you can be. Bring up counseling or therapy to see what your spouse thinks and remember to do so in a constructive way.
Marriage Counselor & Author
In my personal life, I have had a long successful marriage and have remarried following my husband's death. I have had three sons and helped raise a niece for three years and have seven grandchildren. I have loved spending time with them as they were growing up.
I also enjoy getting together with family and friends, ATVing in the mountains, photography, hiking, and traveling. I also enjoy reading, creating art, decorating, and serving others by volunteering.
Assisting couples in rebuilding their marriages has been so rewarding as I've had the privilege of seeing hundreds of couples reunite and get back to being positively connected to one another.
I also work with personal development and those who want to move forward by making positive improvements such as goal setting, self-care, boundaries, behavioral improvements, overcoming procrastination, conflict management, etc.