Many couples decide to get help from a marriage coach, therapist, or a counselor after going through a marriage crisis. Some couples decide to get help simply because they are unhappy with the relationship and believe that the marriage will end if they do not take action. There are a few things you should know about receiving marriage help if you are considering getting in touch with a therapist or a counselor.
How Do You Choose a Professional Helper?
First, you will be searching for what I call a marriage friendly helper who specializes in helping couples with their marriage issues. While different professionals all have advanced training, you will want to know their philosophy about saving a marriage and their success and experience rates. These professionals may have different backgrounds but many of their approaches could be similar.
If either of you is having addictions issues or mental health issues, that spouse will likely need to immediately seek individual help for those special issues in addition to the marriage issues.
For mental health issues, a medical professional may need to evaluate and suggest assistance. For all addiction issues, it is important to commit to the particular course of treatment needed first or at the same time as the marriage help, depending on the seriousness of the addiction issue.
Couple counselors, coaches, or therapist will help you both talk about your problems and find a common ground. Meeting with either is a good option if you are unsure of what kind of professional help would be best since they will be able to refer you to other assistance if needed.
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What Happens During Sessions with Your Professional?
Think of these sessions as a space where you and your spouse can both open up and talk about the relationship. The role of the counselor is to create a safe space where you can communicate about your feelings and about what you expect from the relationship.
You will benefit from attending these sessions if you tend to fight in hurtful ways with your spouse, if communication is difficult or if one of the spouses tends to dominate the conversation.
Your helper will guide the discussion, listen to both of you and make suggestions or recommendations if you and your spouse are unable to find solutions on your own.
Following are tips to help strengthen your marriage. But first, check out my products related to marriage health.
Who Can Benefit From Receiving Marriage Help?
You should think about meeting with a counselor or with a therapist if you and your spouse fight when your marital problems are brought up or if you are unable to even bring up those issues.
You will benefit from counseling if you are unable to find solutions to your problems or if there is too much resentment or other negative feelings for you and your spouse to be able to work on the marriage.
Counseling can also help if you feel that you and your spouse are focusing on the small issues and are unable to keep the big picture in mind. Problems such as a lack of communication or the marriage not meeting your needs can be addressed during counseling.
Receiving marriage counseling is a really important decision and it is something you should bring up with your spouse if you have problems that you feel cannot be addressed or resolved without help. Meeting with a therapist or with a counselor will give you the opportunity to talk about your issues and to actively look for solutions.
There is Still Hope for Your Marriage
I want to share that you have nothing to lose by going to several marriage help sessions. You will always wonder If you could have saved yours by going.
In closing, I want to bust the myth that both of you have to go to make any difference in your marriage! Many believe there is nothing they can do if their spouse refuses to go with them for help.
I work online and on phone with couples all over the country.
After over 25 years, I am still awed by the hundreds of couples who have turned their marriages around in what I consider miraculous ways!
Waverly Hanson
Marriage Counselor & Author
In my personal life, I have had a long successful marriage and have remarried following my husband's death. I have had three sons and helped raise a niece for three years and have seven grandchildren. I have loved spending time with them as they were growing up.
I also enjoy getting together with family and friends, ATVing in the mountains, photography, hiking, and traveling. I also enjoy reading, creating art, decorating, and serving others by volunteering.
Assisting couples in rebuilding their marriages has been so rewarding as I've had the privilege of seeing hundreds of couples reunite and get back to being positively connected to one another.
I also work with personal development and those who want to move forward by making positive improvements such as goal setting, self-care, boundaries, behavioral improvements, overcoming procrastination, conflict management, etc.