What is the secret to a long and happy marriage? Couples who have achieved marital bliss will tell you that marriage is something you need to invest in constantly. These five tips will help you improve your marriage and build a happier home.
1. Be Honest And Kind
Honesty and kindness are crucial for a successful marriage. Find nice things to say to your spouse, give them small gifts and compliment them.
Honesty is important because it will help you communicate more efficiently. If something is bothering you, don’t hesitate to have a talk with your spouse. It is best to talk about your problems when you are both calm and can look for solutions instead of arguing.
2. Understand Your Spouse’s Needs
It is important to talk about what you both expect from the marriage. You cannot build a happy marriage until you understand how you define a good relationship. If you never had this talk before, it is more than time to sit down and talk about what each one of your needs and expectations for your marriage. Communicate your own needs and expectations and remember that showing and expressing love and appreciation is important for a strong relationship.
3. Be Each Other’s Best Friends
Romance is important but becoming each other’s best friend is what will make your marriage last. Try to laugh together every day. You could, for instance, watch funny movies, go see a comedy show or look for some new jokes to tell your spouse. Look for new things you can do together and show interest in the things your spouse cares about. You could also travel together, try a new sport or simply have fun cooking together.
4. Be Your Own Person
You can build a stronger marriage by spending some time apart and by growing as a person outside of the marriage. You could find a new activity you can practice by yourself or spend some time with a group of friends.
Developing interests outside of your marriage will help you have a more fulfilling life and you will find that you have more to share with your spouse and new things to talk about.
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5. Be Realistic
You need to be realistic and accept the idea that there are no perfect marriages. You can build a strong and happy relationship if you accept the fact that you will need to make investments in your marriage on a daily basis.
Set some realistic expectations for the relationship and plan on having talks about the marriage and about your daily lives once a week so you can address any issues as early as possible.
In addition, be sure you do check in times with each other daily to keep connected. It is important not just to do what I call drive-by conversations.
Daily find ways to let each other know how special they are to you!
Avoid the bad habit of taking one another for granted. Wish one another good morning if possible. Greet each other warmly when you come back from your workday. Give that little extra hug or longer kiss! Make a habit of letting one another know something good or bad about your day without going on and on.
These tips will help you build a better marriage. You should discuss them with your spouse and think about what you could do to invest in your marriage. Remember that this is to be even more important than brushing your teeth or the other things you automatically take time to do regularly!
These special small gestures and simple words can make a real difference. Look for examples in the happy couples you know and talk with your spouse to determine what a happy relationship means to them.
Please don’t sell yourself or your marriage short by thinking you can take these things for granted. You have opportunities every day to make these small investments that pay off for life!
Marriage Counselor & Author
In my personal life, I have had a long successful marriage and have remarried following my husband's death. I have had three sons and helped raise a niece for three years and have seven grandchildren. I have loved spending time with them as they were growing up.
I also enjoy getting together with family and friends, ATVing in the mountains, photography, hiking, and traveling. I also enjoy reading, creating art, decorating, and serving others by volunteering.
Assisting couples in rebuilding their marriages has been so rewarding as I've had the privilege of seeing hundreds of couples reunite and get back to being positively connected to one another.
I also work with personal development and those who want to move forward by making positive improvements such as goal setting, self-care, boundaries, behavioral improvements, overcoming procrastination, conflict management, etc.