Are you going through a marriage crisis? A crisis can occur when unresolved problems or specific events lead to tensions and anxiety to become too intense. If you are currently going through a crisis, it is important to keep things in perspective and find a way to resolve things.
What Caused The Crisis?
Try understanding what caused the situation to reach its boiling point. The event that triggered the crisis might seem insignificant but might actually reflect a much deeper issue that has been present in your marriage for years. Take some time to think about what happened and to identify what lead to the crisis.
Don’t Shut Down
Spouses often completely shut down after a crisis. It is important to wait until you are both calm so you can talk about your problems but you should not completely shut down.
Take Some Time Apart
It will be easier to talk about the crisis and to find a solution after you have spent some time apart. Avoid contact for a while if you need to. Think about the crisis, what triggered it and about what you want to do to fix the marriage.
Communicate With Your Spouse
You need to be able to talk about your issues once you have gone through the crisis. Apologizing for what happened might be necessary. You should have a calm discussion about what you both want to do and also about the issues that caused the crisis.
Prevent Another Marriage Crisis
Regardless of what caused the crisis, the same situation will come up again if you do not change things. There might be topics that are difficult to talk about or emotions that come up. This is why taking your time is important but you also need to avoid certain topics or situations for a while.
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Seek Some Help
Dealing with your issues in an objective manner is very difficult. You will benefit from meeting with a therapist or with a counselor or coach who can help you understand what happened and advise you on how to move forward. If you decide to stay together and to make the marriage work, seeking professional help is very important since your therapist or counselor will help you rebuild your marriage one step at a time.
Don’t Rush Things
You might be tempted to rush things and file for divorce or might want to get back together right away to put the crisis behind you. Moving too quickly is not the right answer. The best thing to do is to spend some time apart and to take the time to understand what happened. You should meet with your spouse several times to talk about your options and explore the possibility of fixing things before making a decision.
Going through a crisis can be extremely difficult. You will usually find it helpful to seek help from a marriage counselor, therapist or coach to get through this difficult event. At times family or friends can be helpful. However, much of the time this can complicate situations if others get in the couple’s business too much and take sides.
Take some time to recover, wait until the time is right to talk with your spouse and figure out where to go from here.
Marriage Counselor & Author
In my personal life, I have had a long successful marriage and have remarried following my husband's death. I have had three sons and helped raise a niece for three years and have seven grandchildren. I have loved spending time with them as they were growing up.
I also enjoy getting together with family and friends, ATVing in the mountains, photography, hiking, and traveling. I also enjoy reading, creating art, decorating, and serving others by volunteering.
Assisting couples in rebuilding their marriages has been so rewarding as I've had the privilege of seeing hundreds of couples reunite and get back to being positively connected to one another.
I also work with personal development and those who want to move forward by making positive improvements such as goal setting, self-care, boundaries, behavioral improvements, overcoming procrastination, conflict management, etc.