Marriage counselors, coaches or therapists often help couples deal with the same problems. Many marriages end in divorce because spouses lose interest in trying to fix the marriage or never acknowledge that they have issues until it is too late. Here are five common marriage problems and what you can do about them.
Lack of Communication
You might talk with your spouse on a daily basis and yet feel that there is no communication between you two. It is urgent that you both learn to express yourself and to listen to each other early on in your marriage. This is a skill you can still acquire later in life if you find that good communication is missing from your marriage. The key is to create an atmosphere where both spouses feel safe about opening up and to really listening to what the other has to say.
Does it seem that you can’t have a conversation without fighting with your spouse? A lot of couples have frequent fights about finances, but you might also find yourself fighting over parenting and other issues. Learning to fight fair without name calling and excessive anger is needed to resolve your issues. Schedule some regular talks about your finances, parenting and other things you have to deal with so you can talk calmly and look for solutions.
Lack of Intimacy
Couples often experience a lack of intimacy after several years of marriage. Both spouses might be busy with their career and other things. There might be an underlying issue behind the lack of intimacy, such as a lack of emotional connection in the relationship. Ask yourself why intimacy is lacking in your marriage and make some changes. For example, begin by scheduling time you can spend together or by looking for ways to connect with your spouse again.
Following are tips to help strengthen your marriage. But first, check out my products related to marriage health.
Emotional affairs often occur because the needs of one spouse are not met in the marriage. These needs might be emotional. Infidelity does not necessarily have to cause the end of your marriage. However, it is not an easy journey to move through.
It is a process that takes time. It will require that you make the decision to forgive and rebuilt trust in several ways as well as fix the original cause that led to the betrayal. This means learning to communicate about your needs and look for ways to create a relationship that satisfies the needs of both spouses.
Resentment can build up between you very easily after years spent together while ignoring marriage problems. Resentment makes it difficult to communicate without fighting and makes you not want to address the needs of your spouse. You can get rid of these negative feelings by identifying why you feel resentful and by talking about these problems.
These are a few common issues that couples experience. Your marriage doesn’t have to end if some of these problems sound familiar. It is important to recognize that you have some issues that need to be addressed. You can talk about these problems with your spouse, look for solutions together and think about receiving counseling, coaching or therapy.
There is Hope for Your Marriage
So many couples believe that there is no hope for their marriage when it has become so bad. However, I’m happy to tell you that is not true. Many also believe that unless you both go together for help, one spouse cannot do anything.
I am a living witness that the above beliefs are not true. In my over 25 years and working with hundreds of couples, I am still awed by all the nearly miraculous marriage turnarounds!
Marriage Counselor & Author
In my personal life, I have had a long successful marriage and have remarried following my husband's death. I have had three sons and helped raise a niece for three years and have seven grandchildren. I have loved spending time with them as they were growing up.
I also enjoy getting together with family and friends, ATVing in the mountains, photography, hiking, and traveling. I also enjoy reading, creating art, decorating, and serving others by volunteering.
Assisting couples in rebuilding their marriages has been so rewarding as I've had the privilege of seeing hundreds of couples reunite and get back to being positively connected to one another.
I also work with personal development and those who want to move forward by making positive improvements such as goal setting, self-care, boundaries, behavioral improvements, overcoming procrastination, conflict management, etc.