Your marriage does not have to end because you had an argument or are considering a divorce. It is possible to fix a marriage no matter how bad things might seem at the moment. You need to accept that fixing your marriage takes time and requires some effort from both spouses. At the same time, know that often just one spouse making changes can almost automatically cause the other spouse to change as well.


Here are five tips that will help you get through a rough patch in your marriage.

1. Spend Some Time Apart

Spending time apart is a good way to find yourself again as a person. You will find that you have a lot more to bring to the relationship if you get some alone time and develop a hobby or work on achieving personal goals.

Set some rules and boundaries for this alone time so you can maintain trust in the relationship. Spending a short time apart is important if your marriage has become a source of stress so you can both get a break from the negative emotions you are experiencing.

2. Spend Time As A Couple

A lot of marriages suffer because spouses no longer spend quality time together. You are probably busy with your respective jobs or you might focus only on spending time as a family.

Somehow find a babysitter or child care for your children so you can have a night out as a couple. Schedule some quality time together and try not to leave your issues aside during this time.  However, do let the date time be simply having fun together only. At times meeting for lunch during the day can also work.


3. Talk About Your Issues

You cannot fix the marriage if you do not talk about your issues. You need to schedule some time to talk with your spouse. Address the issues that are hurting your marriage and open up about what you both expect from the relationship.

You might find that you have different expectations from the marriage or that one spouse is not happy with the relationship because of an issue that the other spouse was not aware of.

Many couples find by having both a regular calendar planning and a financial planning time are proactive ways of preventing many problems that arise if there are no set times in place for these two necessary things.




Following are tips to help strengthen your marriage. But first, check out my products related to marriage health.

4. Acceptance and Compromises Are Important

You and your spouse need to accept that no one is perfect and that there are no ideal relationships. Marriages are built on communication and compromises.

You will learn ways to work together to find solutions to your issues and learn to accept each other’s flaws. Look for concrete things you can both do to build a stronger relationship and get over the issues you are encountering as a couple.


5. Get Help If You Need It

Do not be afraid to admit that you need help. Communicating with your spouse about difficult issues that bring up strong feelings on both sides can be difficult. This is especially true if you have not been communicating in a healthy manner during most of your marriage.

You will both benefit from meeting with a coach, counselor or a therapist who will act as a neutral third party and help you open up and address your issues. Be sure to check whether or not the person you are considering is what I call marriage friendly and has a good record of success with couples.


In closing, if you’ve been on my website regularly, you probably know by now that I also do work online with couples so I am able to help wherever people live in the world.

It is possible to fix your marriage after a crisis or if you and your spouse are not satisfied by the relationship. It is important to recognize the fact that you need to make some changes and actively work on saving your marriage. Don’t hesitate to reach out to friends, family or to a counselor or therapist if you need help!


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    Waverly Hanson

    Waverly Hanson

    Marriage Counselor & Author

    In my personal life, I have had a long successful marriage and have remarried following my husband's death.  I have had three sons and helped raise a niece for three years and have seven grandchildren.  I have loved spending time with them as they were growing up.

    I also enjoy getting together with family and friends, ATVing in the mountains, photography, hiking, and traveling. I also enjoy reading, creating art, decorating, and serving others by volunteering. 

    Assisting couples in rebuilding their marriages has been so rewarding as I've had the privilege of seeing hundreds of couples reunite and get back to being positively connected to one another. 

    I also work with personal development and those who want to move forward by making positive improvements such as goal setting, self-care, boundaries, behavioral improvements, overcoming procrastination, conflict management, etc.